According to statistics, the two largest countries in the world (Russia and the United States), about 30% of children brought up in recent years, single-parent families.The reason for this becomes divorce (separation) of the parents, the initial lack of family relationship (birth out of wedlock), the death of the mother or the father.Incomplete family is, of course, not a sentence.In such a family the child, too, can grow healthy and mentally balanced and comprehensive development.But not always.Deviations still occur.And often enough.
order to ensure himself a child growing up without the origin and development of various phobias, needs a family where the attention will be given to this child and the female side (the parent) and the male (father) - a complete family.
Psychology explains neurotic development, behavioral disorders and patoharakterologicheskie primarily lack of a complete family of the child.Incomplete family is reflected in boys, preschool children in moodiness and hysteria, causele
separation initiator is usually the female side (mother), unsatisfied in some cases, excessive softness of her husband and his "inability to live", while others - too rigid and egocentric manifestation of dominance.A smaller role, oddly enough, plays even alcoholism parents.
common cause of hysterical neurosis boys - in the absence of the influence of his father and mother stingy emotional responsiveness.Often this is the result of interpersonal previously not allowed, conflicts with her mother's parents.Mother as it brings the relationship to the children for them to become another source of negative psychological impact.
Sometimes there are "involuntary redirection" negative mother at her son when he grows too much like his father.Especially when not only inherited characteristics, "you're just stupid," "You, too, can not do anything," etc.In other words, the mother gives additional installation on the inferiority of their child.The result - a lack of confidence, shyness, or, on the contrary, aggression and ungovernability.
in single-parent families where the mother is engaged in education, the relationship with his sons more conflict than with their daughters.
in broken families, the mother often returns to the home of his parents.Naturally, they support the daughter, sickened by the former son-in.And not always even aware of, create an additional negative effect on the psyche, the pressure on the child, openly expressing this hostility and recriminations grandson in the likeness of his father, adding to children's experiences.
Sometimes mothers pass the buck to psychotherapists, teachers and educators-night groups of kindergartens and boarding schools.If children are left to live with her mother, taking care of them formally differ little in comparison with the care of children in two-parent families, but the differences in the control - essential.Girls have fewer restrictions than boys.And the pressure on them is much less.Tighter control against the sons explained by the desire to get away from a possible copy of his father's traits.Therefore blame, threats and physical punishment in relation to boys more often applied.On the contrary, left alone with her daughter, the mother refers to her carefully and gently.Partly because it sees it as an extension of itself and, wishing daughter spared to some extent himself.
Parting parents affects the girl more dramatic if it is tied to her father more than her mother.Reactive layers may worsen and fear of losing a mother, that is,fear of loneliness and social isolation.Having lost his father, girls are more likely than boys are afraid to let go of the mother herself.They fear that one day my mother will not come back, or that it is something to happen.Increasing the overall fearfulness, common fears have arisen at an early age.Later - the diagnosis: anxiety neurosis, hysterical neurosis.And in the future - obsessive-compulsive disorder: the rituals of misery, thoughts of failure, insecurity, phobias.
in adolescence has clearly sounds depressive-neurotic symptoms: depressed mood, depression, hopelessness, mistrust, constant fear, lack of confidence in themselves, the experience of the seeming failure, stiffness in communion with the opposite sex, fluctuations in decision-making.
Incomplete family really is not a sentence.Vision inside the relationship with the child, emerging after the collapse of the family, to let go the extra stress and the development of various phobias.Do not forget the main thing: the child is not to blame for the fact that not a relationship in adults.The single-parent family sympathy, support and participation are necessary in the first place the child, whose fate was decided without his knowledge or consent ...